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 History invariably depicts King Henry VIII as a rotund, middle-aged monarch, but Showtime would have us erase that image from our memory; and it’s fair to say, their alternative is a much juicier substitute indeed.
In The Tudors, the young king is a sexy, rebellious bad boy, throwing wild parties and sowing his wild oats. Henry, it seems, is a really a bit of a rock god. And with the gorgeous Jonathan Rhys Meyers in the role, who am I to argue?
Rhys Meyers played bisexual glam rocker Brian Slade in the over-the-top 70s homage, Velvet Goldmine. Here he goes one step further, revelling in a brazen, philandering role. Even the subtitle of this mini-series spells it out: It’s Good to Be King.
This excessive, soapy approach to Britain’s past is the work of writer Michael Hirst (Elizabeth). He beefs up the ambitions and egos of his central players, giving little time to the intricacies of history. Henry comes across as a kind of forerunner to J.R. Ewing.
Henry VIII ascended to the throne by default after the death of his older brother, but was unable to father a child with his wife, Katherine of Aragon. The Tudors would have us believe he satiated much of this discontent by seducing every maiden in sight. There are lots of boudoir scenes with Rhys Meyers ripping off silk shirts. Ripping torsos, nubile nipples and hot, steamy sex abounds.
Several of the other key cast members are superb anatomic specimens, with designer haircuts and grooming that leaves them looking like they’ve stepped out of Footballer’s Wives.
Adding some acting weight to the cast is Sam Neill as Cardinal Thomas Wolsey. As Henry’s chief advisor, Wolsey wields almost as much power as the King, but with less bombastic arrogance. The ageless Neill is an easy fit for this tempered role.
Visually, The Tudors is a treat. Shot lavishly in Ireland, it boasts glorious costumes and green, British landscapes. There are swordfights, battles, pomp and grand ceremony, and righteous speeches.
I don’t mean to give the impression that this is all window dressing with no substance. Indeed, there were Golden Globe nominations for both Rhys Meyers and the 10 part series It’s not going to replace curriculum classics like A Man for All Seasons, but who’s complaining?
The Tudors screens 8:30pm Wednesdays on Showcase.
TV Guide
SATURDAY FEB 9
[Nine/7:30pm] SURVIVOR: CHINA. Final. Flight attendant Todd is down to the final four, but has he pissed off too many of his peers on the Tribal Council? Do I ‘root’ for the gay boy, or one of the nicer contestants? I’m so torn.
SUNDAY 10
[Seven/9:30pm] BROTHERS AND SISTERS. New Series. Light a fuse and wait for each character to go off. Kevin, who hasn’t had a haircut all summer, has fallen for his priest boyfriend, but is set to be parted. Uncle Saul has a visit from his gay ex (Michael Nouri). Central is Sally Field’s anguish over Justin in Iraq. Cue weekly water works - and another Emmy.
MONDAY 11
[Fox8/12:00pm] THE 50TH ANNUAL GRAMMY AWARDS. Live.
[Seven/8:30pm] DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES. New Series. New neighbour Katherine (Dana Delaney) joins the street with her doctor hubby and her mysterious daughter. Marcia Cross doesn’t have much to do except wear her fake pregnancy prop. But Lynette provides the biggest shock of all, as Felicity Huffman demonstrates total commitment to the role.
[Ten/9:00pm] GOOD NEWS WEEK. Premiere. Paul McDermott returns with Mikey Robbins and new team captain Claire Hooper to show Glenn Robbins and co that scripted gags are sometimes a better idea than just sitting around doing radio on television. SUPERNATURAL follows.
[Seven/9:30pm] DIRTY SEXY MONEY. Premiere. On the baggage carousel that is this dysfunctional family comes one of New York’s richest. Lawyer Nick (Peter Krause) provides some anchorage as they spiral out of control, Hilton-style. It looks like malicious fun though, with William Baldwin trying to keep a lid on his hush-hush affair with a ‘transvestite hooker’. From gay creatives Greg Berlanti (BROTHERS AND SISTERS, BROKEN HEARTS CLUB) and Bryan Singer (HOUSE). Get on board.
[SBS/10:00pm] SKINS. This riotous episode sees the gang on an excursion to deepest Russia with vodka, police bribes, teacher and student dalliances, busty Russkie gals, and a glue factory. Gay Maxxie is shunned by his Muslim friend Anwar, cute kid Tony tries to hit on him. An expertly woven comedy of errors.
TUESDAY 12
[Nine/8:30pm] TERMINATOR: SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES. Premiere. Set somewhere between T2 and T3 is this big-budget action drama that shows more promise than BIONIC WOMAN (but that’s not saying much). Sarah is oddly brunette, with a twink son she needs to protect to save the world from the future. Could go either way, really.
WEDNESDAY 13
[TEN/8:00pm] BACK TO YOU. Premiere. Great to see Kelsey Grammar back in this enjoyable, traditional sitcom about feuding news anchors. Mary Kostakidis and Stan Grant, anyone?
[Nine/8:30pm] UNDERBELLY. Premiere. Pick of the Week. Sure, we’ve all tired of the publicity push yet this tale is peppered with fantastic actors, notably Les Hill, Caroline Gillmer and the powderkeg that is Damian-Walshe Howling. A brilliant knucklemeat sandwich from Lygon Street.
THURSDAY 14
[Seven/9:30pm] LOST. The most diabolical drama in years is ready to start solving clues rather than setting them up. The biggest shift in Series 4 is that we now have flash-forwards with survivors known as ‘the Oceanic Six’. But who?
For amendments check www.tvtonight.com.au
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