|
Wednesday, 03 September 2008 |
 There are fears by those who fear such things that legislation giving de facto couples – same-sex and straight – access to the Family Court will create a sea of love triangles in which traditional marriage will disappear as surely as if it were an aircraft in the Bermudan.
It's going to cause Australians to rush into bigamous relationships! What about marriage!
But it gets much worse. The Rudd Government’s bill allows for a person in a de facto relationship to take their partner to the Family Court in a property dispute even if that person is married.
So, you're a Toorak matron, happily married for, oh, decades and decades, and in comes your husband’s male lover to tell you to move out before the end of the month because he owns the house, bitch.
Conservative politicians are rushing to fix this triangular geometry; the only kind of relationship they know is linear, being the shortest distance between a man and a woman.
Left uncorrected, the law will reinvent a type of young man that used to be known in ancient Rome as a ‘legacy hunter’. These people were professionals. They attached themselves to older, unmarried Roman men who were about to die in the hope that the old goat’s property would go to them. They showered their targets with favours sexual and whatever they could afford in the way of little ‘remember me’ presents. The poet and satirist Horace gave this advice to legacy hunters: when your victim offered to show you his will, act offended and push it away – but quickly note the bit beneath the preamble to see if there were any names listed apart from your own as beneficiaries.
On this issue I am old school: it would be a blow, after you’d endured years of work down on that cock or pussy, putting in the hard yards night after night, to find some twink had robbed you of house, home and that armoire you love for a few sympathy fucks in a nightclub toilet. Before love, justice!
 |
Show/Hide comments
Show/Hide comment form
